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The actual reason which prompted me to write this blog, is a sad demise of my collegemate..
But the thing that forced me 2 write this is the attitude of ppl and the way they took his death..
I expected a unrest situation in collg after the incident.But to my utter dismay i found ppl from my class[the guy was from IT],were completely normal the very next day.Even those who were a witness to his corpse.ppl from my class were not even consoling the frns of his citing reason that They-Had-No-Words!!But gave more than mouthful while dicussing it within their own clan!!To stamp them as insensitive faggots would be polite and humble of me..Some were on my nerves when they made comments like..why the hell did he have to come all the way to commit suicide in collg
accusations that he did it for a gal who spurned his proposal..and some[couples] said that tutorial room's would be closed so they didnt have any place to study[READ MAKE OUT!!]and what not!!..Im not pretendin to pose a holier-than-thou image..or lead a candle light procession to cleanse thy soul or some philosophical shit..
I just ponder at my inability to understand normal ppl under normal circumstances..Ive considered myself good at judgin people like psychs,racists,cynics,wannabe's,intellects,bummers and eccentric's alike..But normal ppl hell NO!!
What made them normal lemme..explain..Iam pretty new to mumbai..so when my freinds gave me a piece of their head,tat no1 has time to stand and stare..or at the maddened pace at which the city moves..and the people who adapt to such environment are fit and normal..gush..
Could it be that exams were approachin so they did not have time to pray for his piteous soul..Or the fact that he commited suicide,so they do not have respect for him.one question to You.Would you have "honoured" his death by firing 21 bullets in air if he died under natural circumstance?Why can't they come into terms that he is no more..
Frankly i did not expect any sign of worry,but at least thought that such trying circumstances could u-know-im outta words..
If this was the case,the owner of the shop where he n his buddies used to smoke asked me..whats the cast of the boy?Is he the sole son of his family?His sympathies were for his father..that their son wud be no more to fulfill his last rituals..I do not understand such bastards..Such questions fill my thoughts and when i share them,they say that iam immature..[reminding me of my X's words while ditchin me!!]..I just wish i could understand such people and the tyranny of wild thoughts in my head R.I.P...Amen..hope ur soul is at peace SURAJ!
Khalas
18 years ago
3 comments:
First of all, a new beginning! So, congrats for havin the courage (after the previous one turned out to be both a debacle & an absolute disaster - no hard feelings) and for takin the time out to write - esp on somethin that personal & college-related ....
Now onto the subject of the post - In that firstly, the tone & language of the post is typical Dhanesh - u tend to be too emotionally involved in the post u r writing (which I appreciate), but it kinda takes objectivity out of the post. Also, the language can be refined & the gist of what u r trying to convey can be put forth more elegantly - but that doesn't take credit away from u for trying.
The questions u hav raised bout people's apathy & insensitivity towards nearly everythin in this cosmopolitan hellhole called Mumbai is a good one .... I understand the socio-culture shock when the death of a guy one used to talk to causes not even a flutter amongst the pigeons sitting on the Library parapets .... but sadly Alas! This is what life has come to! People have lost all sense of empathy & have become desensitized.
Why is that u may ask? Well, true Suraj's death is a tragedy - a life potentially full of happiness & expectation come to an end in a self-created chasm. But the point is, how many people do we see on Mumbai's streets who die of malnutrition & ignorance? How many small street-urchins you have seen who have no-one to take care of & spend their time counting how much money they have made through pick-pockets rather than doing problems of algebra/geometry.
The point I am trying to make here is that Mumbai is so full of failure leading to poverty/unhappiness leading to a slow systemic rot within oneself leading to depression/death across all sections of society & in such public view (in trains, in buses, in front of the neighbourhood Barista with rich kids doing hookah), that it has desensitized us! We no more are shocked when young people so full of promise & apparently rewarded with wonderful opportunities (Suraj was placed in TM if I am not mistaken) get carried away & inflict upon their near ones a tragedy. But then again, neither are we shocked when a father rapes her own daughter or an MBA Grad kills his girlfriend by bludgeoning her head with a stone, are we?
I don't think one can be too harsh on the people who you say have failed to register enough of a shock/sadness at Suraj's death. I In Rome u do what the Romans do.
And unfortunately in this mean bad big city, people just move on without fluttering & pausing. Sad but True.
yeah...it seems to me too that his friends failed miserably in salvaging his life...and they know about their folly...
but, that's what i think...no help from anyone...only an article in the paper about that death...
dont know the facts of the case...
quite a dysfunctional class, apart...
u wont beleive it dhanesh we were all there in the colegge wen the dead body was taken out...2 juniors in front of me a guy and a girl,the guy was supposed to teach her i suppose.the guy stood outside watchin the happenings,the girl comes out and says "cumon dont waste my time..some foolsh guy has ended his life we better start studyn and stop wastin time"..i was shocked at her insensitivity and thanks to the instilled values in me i was prayin 4 his soul.i was choked thinking how his parents must have felt.well i have been manier times in bouts of depression and the thought almost crosses my mind to end my life,but the first thing comes in my mind is my mom who has borne,endured for nine months and given me this wonderful life.life is precious and beauiful.failures and setbacks arein everyones life and suicide is a permanent solution to temprory problems.we all need to value and love our lives
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